christmas tree peppermint bark pop tarts
Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree, how lovely are your pastries.
I procrastinated this recipe for a damn long time. Even the day I made them I put off the decoration part to make soup – fucken good soup, if I can say so myself. I have a bit of a self-confidence issue when it comes to piping designs onto things. My hands tend to shake, I fall victim to the “don’t mess up don’t mess up” repetition which immediately results in me messing up. All that amalgamates into me getting pissed, calling myself a failure, and a whole slew of other unpleasant anxiety-induced events.
Yup, lotta glamor over here.
But, I finally broke past my yips and now absolutely adore these pop tarts. Not my first rodeo with the pastry, but certainly one of the most enjoyable. Those little trees, though! Squee. A bit less traditional for a cookie box than, you know, a cookie, but one that’ll incite smiles in the recipient. Certainly some charm to a good ole pop tart, especially a cutie like this guy.
So, what have we here? A fudgy peppermint dark chocolate filling, storebought pie crusts for ease and reduced fuss, and a minty white chocolate glaze drizzled overtop. Double the mint, because peppermint bark, obviously. Finish with a precious little piped on Christmas tree, as simple or elaborate as you’d like. Kids will love annihilating any semblance of a Christmas tree with their haphazard artistry, and maybe it’ll give you a good laugh, too.
Oh, Fudge
Some fudge sauces can be quite complex, but I really wanted to keep this is as user-friendly as possible, with minimal ingredients. Let me tell you, you don’t even need the hassle of heating one damn burner on the stove for two minutes. A microwave is enough.
Melt down some dark chocolate chips with a little butter and sugar, then stir in peppermint extract (just a little, DO NOT OVER DO IT ELSE YOU’LL BE CONSUMING CREST WHITE STRIPS), vanilla, and whole milk. Get it all nice and smooth, then let it rest a bit on the counter to thicken. The result is a gloriously silky, shiny ganache-like sauce.
Pie to the Face
Well, I hope not. That’d be a perfect waste of a pop tart.
If you like to make homemade pie crusts, have at it, otherwise just pop over to the store and buy whatever frozen fixtures are available. One at a time, roll them out and slice into a rectangle, then slice that rectangle into 6 smaller rectangles. Yo dawg, I heard you like rectangles. Size them about 3 x 4 inches – I use a ruler because one, I can’t cut in a straight line to save my ass, and two, this assures I get them as even as possible. No shame in grabbing some elementary school tools. Take whatever scraps you have from each crust and roll out to get two more rectangles, to total 8 from each crust and 16 from both. Yay math!
Set 8 of the rectangles on a parchment lined baking sheet. Brush the tops with egg wash and spoon some of the fudge sauce in the center, leaving a 1/4 inch border. Spread the egg wash other the second set of rectangles and place, wash side down, on top of the fudgy rectangles. Crimp around the edges with a fork to seal in the chocolatey dopeness. Pop that baking sheet in the fridge to firm up the pastries, then bakey bakey until they’re nice and golden in a 425 degree oven.
I’m Dreaming of a White (Chocolate) Christmas
Cool those puppies down, then ready yourself for the peppermint white chocolate glaze. I told you, lots of mint, but not too much. Melt down some white chocolate, then stir in a touch of powdered sugar, a couple drops of peppermint extract, and a little milk to thin it out.
Drizzle the white chocolate shit over the pop tarts, letting it slither down the sides a bit. Channel the ooooo brigade. Once the drizzle is a little firm, you’re ready to tackle the trees. Well, don’t tackle them, I doubt that’s an effective way to cut down your balsam fir from the farm. Probably just end up with a mouthful of sap and a lot of bruises.
Anywho, you have options with the green frosting. I went the 100% lazy copout route and bought a pre-colored piping bag, which is honestly a fine investment if you have a lot of spiffy baked goods to do. You can also double the white chocolate glaze and divide it in half, then add a teaspoon or so more powdered sugar to thicken one half and dye it green. Both options are dandy.
Sploosh on those trees, and if you’d like save a few to sprinkle with crushed candy canes for a true peppermint bark vibe. Or you could go full tree, or full crushed cane. Whatever floats your boat, pals.
Look for these dudes in my upcoming cookie box (pssst, they keep very well in the fridge for up to a week), which I should have done by the beginning of next week if I get my ass in gear!
Tried this recipe out? Leave a rating and comment below with your thoughts, and don’t forget to come say hi on Instagram and show me what you made!
Pop goes the poptart:
Homemade Boston Cream Donut Pop Tarts
Homemade Frosted Maple Waffle Pop Tarts
christmas tree peppermint bark pop tarts
Ingredients
- 1 1/2 cups dark chocolate chips or chunks
- 2 tbsp butter
- 2 tbsp sugar
- 1/4 cup whole milk
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 1/4 tsp peppermint extract
- 2 sheets pie crust, thawed (1 box)
- 1 egg, lightly beaten, for wash
- green icing and candy balls, for trees
- 2-3 mini candy canes, crushed
peppermint white chocolate glaze
- 1/4 cup good-quality white chocolate chips
- 1/4 cup powdered sugar
- 1/8 tsp peppermint extract
- 1-2 tbsp whole milk, to thin
Instructions
- In a microwave-safe bowl, heat the dark chocolate, butter, and sugar on high power for 1 minute. Stir until the bowl is no longer warm. If needed, heat another 15-20 seconds until totally melted. Stir in the milk, vanilla extract, and peppermint extract. Let cool on the counter for 15 minutes until slightly thickened.
- Remove one pie crust from the fridge. Roll out on a lightly floured surface, then cut into a large rectangle. Measure and cut six rectangles about 3 x 4 inches. Re-roll the scraps and cut out two additional rectangles to create 8 in total. Repeat with the second pie crust.
- Place 8 of the rectangles on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Brush the tops with the egg wash. Spoon a heaping 1 tablespoon of the fudge filling in the center of each pop tart and gently spread, leaving a 1/4 inch border.
- Brush the bottom side of the second set of 8 rectangles and lay on top of the rectangles on the baking sheet. Try to match by similar size as best as you can, but they don't need to be perfect! Crimp around the edges to seal the filling. Place the baking tray in the fridge for 20 minutes.
- In the meantime, preheat the oven to 425 degrees.
- Bake the pop tarts for 10 minutes until golden and slightly puffed. Let cool on the baking sheet for 10 minutes, then move to a wire rack and cool completely.
- To make the white chocolate glaze: melt the white chocolate chips in the microwave for 1 minute. Stir. Whisk in the powdered sugar, peppermint extract, and 1 tablespoon of milk. If needed, thin with an additional tablespoon of milk.
- Drizzle the glaze over each pop tart. Let harden for 15 minutes. Pipe on the Christmas trees with the green icing – don't worry if they're a little akimbo, I'm not the best Peter Piper either. Add a small yellow or orange bowl to the top for the "star" and additional "lights" as desired. Sprinkle some of the pop tarts with the crushed candy canes.
- Serve immediately, or cover and store in the fridge for up to a week.
