pizza night italian chopped salad

I guess frequent pizza-making requires a salad to balance shit out.

Not that I’m attempting to guilt trip you fine folk into thinking your diet is incomplete without salad. A few big slabs of pizza on their own is a perfectly viable meal. But, a side dish is oft desired, and if you’re not feeling garlic knots or buffalo wings, perhaps a big bowl of chop-chop is just what you need.

I’ve been meal prepping salads more or less weekly since the start of the year. Takes the guesswork out of lunches, once I return from my runs after work and bust through my front door starving and ready to demolish anything in my line of sight.

Or, like today, I chopped up a bunch of shit for a southwest-style salad and opted to make fried fish tacos instead for lunch. Good job, asshole.

I’m pleased as punch with this big hearty bowl. There is nothing complex about it, no cooking or heating or anything of the like. The prep time is in the chopping, my friends. Then you just tossy-toss, shake up a vinaigrette, and boom. Nom nom nom. Pizza’s best friend.

Karate Chop

This is a two-step salad, more or less. Unless you count each individual component’s chop time as multiple steps, but I don’t. So, we’re doing the two-step. Two steeeEEEP, two steeeEEEP.

The nice thing about this dish is that you can add more shit to it, as you see fit. The bits I chose are my favorites. This is how it breaks down, folks:

Greens…Well, the romaine is green, the purple cabbage is assuredly not green unless you’re some flavor of colorblind. Cabbage isn’t necessarily a traditional Italian component, but I came across a perfectly sized head at the store and decided to roll with it.

Briney, pickly shit…I used a combination of green and kalamata olives, and some pepperonicinis.

Vegetables…Cherry tomatoes and Persian cucumbers comprise our produce.

Protein…I really dislike calling chickpeas a protein, but alas.

Cheese…Smoked provolone finishes off our bowl. You can use regular, too, if smoked ain’t yo thang.

Some other suggestions: any manner of salamis if you’re not vegetarian, sundried tomatoes (I only didn’t use them here because I flat out forgot to buy a jar), some shaved parmesan.

Basically, all you gotta do with this plethora of shit is chuck it in a giant bowl and toss it all together. Or, arrange it prettily in layers and segments. Whatever floats your boat.

Avert Your Eyes, The Salad’s Dressing

An easy Italian vinaigrette accompanies our lovely dude. The same formula appears in my Italian Chopped Olive and White Bean Salad – which is one of my favorites, if I may slide that in.

To make, just shake or whisk up some olive oil, red wine vinegar, honey, dijon, mustard, dried basil and oregano, and garlic cloves. Poke in some salt and pepper to your taste preference. Any leftover dressing makes a dope marinade for shrimp, salmon, or chicken. So, nothing will go to waste.

Serve your salad and dressing with your cheesiest, greasiest slices of pizza, or add some type of proper protein and enjoy as a meal itself. I oft toast up some baguette and slater it with butter as an accompaniment. Or, bake up some fries. Fries are life.

If you’d like a vegan salad, just omit the provolone. Easy as that.

The only thing I look forward to about the warmer months is the kaleidoscope of multihued produce. Yes, the only thing. Cos otherwise summertime can kiss my ass.

Tried this recipe out? Leave a rating and comment below with your thoughts, and don’t forget to come say hi on Instagram and show me what you made!

A palate for salad:

Shaved Brussels Sprout and Chickpea Caesar Salad

Spicy Roasted Sweet Potato Feta and Kale Salad

Pepperoni Pizza Pasta Salad

Guacamole Salad