spicy sweet pineapple buffalo cheddar pizza
All ya’ll getting sick of pizza yet? Too damn bad. I’m probably getting sick of you too.
The pizza train is wheelin’ and dealin’ still on this fine January day. And I’d imagine it’ll spark some controversy among a select few of you, because yes, we have some pineapple gracing this pie.
Honestly, as far as pineapple on pizza goes, I don’t really give much of a shit. I don’t seek out pizzas with pineapple, largely because they’re usually dotted with sliced ham too and I don’t eat that. But if there’s an intriguing vegetarian fixture that happens to contain pineapple, why the fuck not? I don’t mind the sweet-savory palate play. Can be rather satisfying.
I discovered two bottles of buffalo sauce in my pantry recently, because I’m a dumbshit and tend to double purchase because you can’t find anything easily in my larders and I usually forget whether I’ve bought something or not. Buffalo sauce isn’t the worst thing to repeat, though. I use it quite frequently in my cooking, particularly in lazy cooking stages like I’m in now.
Plus, because I’m a pizza fiend, another buffalo-themed pizza felt right. Then I thought of pineapple. Then I thought why not combine the two? Then I just did it. As is wont when I’m developing new fuckery.
A bit of sweet, a bit of heat, a good fun pizza to fuck up your friends on gameday. Well, leastwise the friends that are anti-pineapple. 30 minutes start to end if you utilize all the good shortcuts – storebought dough, storebought buffalo sauce. The best pies are the quickest pies.
It’s Neither a Pine Nor an Apple
Though it is kinda spiny like a pine tree.
Extremely unrelated narrative: I remember when I was a dumbass kid we’d play wiffleball in my front yard, and at one particular time we had a fledgling palmetto tree growing by the driveway. Well, my dumb ass decided when “rounding the bases” to try and jump over the tree to dodge a tag. Tore up my legs with cuts (palmettos are spiny).
All this to say that pineapples remind me of that ridiculous day, since palmettos also have fronds.
Anyway.
I like to make homemade dough, but if you have less time, storebought is dandy. I also think that jarred buffalo sauce is more than adequate as well. I like Frank’s Red hot.
I do, however, take time to make my own ranch, as in the other day’s blackened shrimp tacos. Actually, I had some leftover from that recipe which in part birthed this one. Fuck yeah, efficiency. My version is Greek yogurt based and very easy: lemon juice, dried parsley and dill, garlic and onion powders, and buttermilk. Whisk all that together and taste for seasoning adjustments.
Pile It On the Dough
Alrighty. Grab that pound of dough, split it in half – you’ll get two nice sized pizzas from this recipe.
Preheat your oven to 500 degrees, for at least 30 minutes ahead of time I’d say. Get it nice and hot. So hot that Nelly would approve.
Roll, punch, slap, kick, wallop, press, manhandle that ball of dough into a roughly 10 inch circle and set onto a cornmeal-dusted baking sheet. Or, if you preheated a pizza stone, on that. I don’t really use one of those, though maybe I should. Poke a few holes in that bih, brush with some olive oil, and parbake for a few minutes to set the crust and give it a little goldenness.
Then, add your toppings. Buffalo sauce, a swirl of ranch, some chopped pineapple, and finally a good smattering of cheddar and pepper jack cheeses. Yup, this baby has some kick. You can swap out the pepper jack for monterey jack if you want the pie a touch milder. Or get some habanero jack if you’re a masochist.
Pop the pizza back in the oven for 8-10 minutes loner, until bubbly and crisp and making you drool. Mmhmm.
To serve, I like a drizzle of honey (trust me, it’s rad), some extra buffalo sauce, and, of course, a little bowl of ranch. Some fresh basil or oregano are nice touches, too.
Hey, you might surprise yourself and start liking pineapple on pizza. Or not. I don’t care. But, don’t be surprised if another pie shows up in this space, embellished with our little tropical friend.
Tried this recipe out? Leave a rating and comment below with your thoughts, and don’t forget to come say hi on Instagram and show me what you made!
All I do is win-win-win (and eat pizza, which is also winning):
Sweet and Savory Cheddar, Apple, and Caramelized Onion Pizza
Olive Cheese Pizza with Feta Stuffed Crust
spicy sweet pineapple buffalo cheddar pizza
Ingredients
- 1 lb pizza dough, homemade or store bought
- 2/3 cup buffalo sauce, homemade or store bought
- 1/4 cup ranch dressing (recipe below)
- 1 1/2 cups fresh pineapple, sliced into small chunks
- 1 cup sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
- 1 cup pepper jack cheese, shredded
- honey and fresh herbs, to serve
Greek yogurt ranch
- 1 cup plain whole milk Greek yogurt
- 2 tbsp lemon juice
- 1 tbsp dried parsley
- 1 tsp dried dill
- 1 tsp garlic powder
- 1 tsp onion powder
- 1/4-1/3 cup buttermilk, to thin
Instructions
- Preheat oven to 500 degrees. Sprinkle a bit of cornmeal onto a large baking sheet.
- Make the ranch dressing. In a bowl, stir together the Greek yogurt, lemon juice, parsley, dill, garlic and onion powder, and 1/4 cup of buttermilk. Add more buttermilk as needed to thin. Taste and adjust salt and pepper.
- Split the pizza dough in half. Working with one half, push, press, slap, toss, etc. into a roughly 10 inch circle. Place onto the prepared baking sheet. Prick holes all over the center and brush with 1 tablespoon olive oil. Parbake for 5 minutes until lightly golden.
- Spread half of the buffalo sauce onto the pizza, then swirl half of the ranch on top. Sprinkle half of the pineapple chunks evenly on the crust, and finish with half of each cheese. Bake an additional 8-10 minutes until the crust is crisp and the cheese melted and bubbly. Repeat steps with the second ball of dough.
- Serve with additional buffalo sauce and ranch, and fresh herbs, as desired.
