Start with the jalapeno ranch - it's best when it's chilled awhile! Combine all ingredients in a food processor and puree until smooth and creamy. If you want a more dressing-like consistency rather than a thicker, dip-like texture, add 2-4 tbsp buttermilk or milk of choice as you blend. Taste for salt and pepper as you go. Pour into an airtight container and place into a fridge until ready to serve.
Preheat oven to 450 degrees and line a baking sheet with parchment. You can probably fry the broccoli instead, but I am scared crapless by deep frying and never really get it even, so baking it is here.
To one bowl, whisk 1/2 cup flour, garlic, onion, paprika, baking powder, salt and pepper, and beer until completely combined. Measure 1/4 cup flour and panko into two separate bowls. Roll broccoli florets in plain flour first until lightly covered, then dip broccoli into beer batter until completely covered, shaking off excess. Finish by dredging in panko and set onto baking sheet. Repeat until all broccoli is used. You may not need all of the batter. Bake for 10 minutes, turn, then bake for 10 more minutes until crispy and golden. If you wish, set under the broiler for 2-3 minutes, watching closely, to get a deeper gold hue.
For the slaw, toss together greens, onion, jalapeno, black bean, lime juice, salt and pepper until incorporated.
To build the tacos, place a heap of slaw on the bottom, then top with broccoli florets and drizzle with jalapeno ranch. Enjoy!